The best Mothers Day gift, LESS STRESS

Mother's Day is almost here. Are you ready?

I speak from the perspective of having a 3 year old...so maybe some of this will hit home, or maybe not...I do think these are helpful hints to ANYONE giving something to ANY MOM ANYTIME.

What do I want? Less. Less to do. Less stress. Less to think about. Less guilt.

Yes, I wrote guilt. As a mom, "guilt" seems to leak into my thinking frequently. I always want to do more. I want to work more, but I also want to plan more for my child, and I want to relax more and read more, yet I also want to organize my recipes and photos...MORE. I make note of these wants on my to-do list, and there they remain awaiting their "check marks." It's not until I reach the "I must have tangible evidence of productivity" point that I will tackle one of these personal, non-urgent projects. Hmmmm, the last one was moving all hazardous cleaning agents to a top shelf. Ah, the glory of a job completed. Check.

And even when the opportunity presents itself for true relaxation, I find I enjoy and appreciate it most IF I don't feel that I should be doing something else, or even MORE IMPORTANT, that when I return to reality, I won't be ambushed by a load of "to dos". So what this really means is that outside of my daily yoga class, I prefer "doing" over relaxing.

So for ANYONE looking to treat any MOM in their lives, here are some strategies that work wonders for me:

1. Rubbing. Nothing beats a 90 minute massage. Please don't spring it on me at the last minute. Instead give me notice or even let me plan it so I can maximize my relaxation before and after. Otherwise, the post rub Zen can quickly evaporate...like it didn't even happen. And that is an affront to my frugal nature. Make it easy for me so that when I go, I won't feel guilty and when I come home, I can just bask in it. Kid asleep, dinner ready, wine ready to pour!

2. A TRUE Day Off. Honestly, I'm not sure this is even possible. But, I tell you, for those who like to be productive, having a day to myself to organize, relax, or whatever is muy bueno. I have so many projects waiting in the wings, I worry I'd be paralyzed with indecision as to where to start. I also haven't slept past 6a in over a year...And likely I'd still wake up early to maximize the day!

3. Offload a Pesky Chore. I hear from many mom friends, that some of the daily chores, such as preparing lunches for school, are dreaded. So, significant others, make lunches for a week. Or if your significant other has been hounding you to do a few chores, do them now.

4. Chic Time. Women need this. It has been documented. Women need to energize with friends. So if the budget is big, spring for a night away at a nearby, upscale, hotel. And if there can be some massage thrown in, even better. If Mom's best friend can't do it, Mom may welcome the away time anyway. I think I'd rent several movies, order dinner in and bring my favorite bottle of wine (Rombauer Chardonnay).

5. Treats. Transform the ordinary to the extraordinary. What is the routine in your house? Think of a few things to up the ante in terms of luxury. For me, it would definitely be a major upgrade to my nightly glass of wine. Fresh flowers are always a good idea, but don't present a big bouquet that then needs to be arranged, cut, and put into a vase. That's work! Instead, buy Mom's favorites and arrange them in several vases around the house.

Living in San Diego is already a daily treat, but for those living in less temperate climates, I am sure some weather related ideas, trips, outings would also be welcome.

Of course, more than anything, Mom wants to know that she is appreciated for all that she does each day.